Janel McCormick provides some helpful advice:

Marriage

Have you ever met a couple that has said that their marriage has always been easy? Neither have I. There is a great explanation for this; building and maintaining a healthy marriage was never meant to be an easy task.

Marriage is perhaps the most important choice to be made in the life of an adult. This relationship and commitment has the most far-reaching effects, for it can bring, not only immediate happiness, but also eternal joys. Marriage affects many more than the two people who have made a vows to each other. Every member of their families, particularly their children and their children’s children down through the many generations to come will feel the effects of a single marriage relationship. Marriage is a spiritual and cultural covenant, made between two consenting adults that they will fully commitment their lives to each other regardless of the difficulties that they may face. Marriage is a very precious and important commitment that should never be taken lightly. Research has determined that having a healthy, happy, fulfilling marriage benefits all family members. A healthy marriage offers personal, emotional and economical stability to each person as well as the family unit.

Relationship In A Marriage

Maintaining a healthy marital relationship is not always easy. Any long-lasting relationship requires maintenance and marriage is meant to be the longest lasting relationship of a person’s life. Efforts of both husband and wife should be equal in order to insure their marital relationship continues to be enjoyable and comfortable. Think of trust as the key stone of a committed relationship. A structure will crumble if the key stone is compromised, just as a marriage will crumble when trust is compromised by dishonesty. Being honest with each other is vital for building a strong relationship. Even if a couple is yet to be married, they should strive to learn how to strengthen marriage. Those who are considering marriage should also begin building a healthy marriage before they begin building a perfect wedding. This is when a couple should seek out tips on marriage, learn them and, most importantly, practice them before a commitment for eternity is made.

Intimacy In A Marriage

Sexual attraction and energy is often at its highest levels in the early stages of a relationship. Intimacy is an important part of marriage but more important is emotional fulfillment. The physical aspect of intimacy should never be sought through sex only. Although this is not an area that should be neglected in a marriage, the importance of romance and simple touching should not be forgotten. It is important to remember that any relationship based mainly on sexual attraction or sexual activity may be sabotaged from the beginning. Proper intimacy in marriage is an expression of love, respect and appreciation. Expressions of affection and kindness keep love and friendship alive in marriage. A couple should continue to date throughout their long lives together. This simple concept assures that husband and wife continue to build their friendship, reinforce their attraction, and renew their love for in each other. It is also important to understand that, for many people, the way they are spoken to and treated by their spouse throughout the day is a major factor in their continuous sexual attraction. The act of making love should be preceded by showing love through your words and actions.

Communication In A Marriage

Marriage relationships can be enriched by communication. Communication is one of the most important parts of a healthy relationship. Effective communication takes practice, patience and a great deal of effort. Numerous studies suggest that marital outcomes can be predicted, with a high degree of accuracy, based primarily on aspects of a couples communication and ability to manage conflict. It is important to take turns talking so that both will have the opportunity to be heard and to talk about their feelings. Almost more important than talking to a spouse about feelings, desires, frustrations or even anger is listening. While one is speaking, the other should be giving their full attention. Listening is more than just hearing with your ears. A couple should listen with their heart, mind, and emotions. It should also be said that communication is not restricted to talking. People communicate in many different ways. A couple needs to commit themselves to recognizing how their spouse communicates without words. Please remember that it is okay and healthy to disagree as long as you employ respectful and loving communication skills. The use of functional communication to resolve your problems, instead of walking away or ignoring the issue is a very healthy way of nurturing your relationship. This also has the added bonus of teaching you children positive conflict resolution techniques through example.

Conclusion

Marriage is a continuous cycle of growth, learning and growth. Husband and wife should never stop searching for new things to fall in love with in their spouse. Every marriage should be an inspiration to all those around the couple particularly their children. A healthy marriage relationship begins by building healthy communication, trust and respect for each other before marriage. There may be times when a conflict or problem may require the use of techniques that you are unfamiliar with. Should this happen there is no shame in looking for alternative resources. Every city in the country has resources readily available that provide tips on marriage and family communication. If you keep your communication clear, accept and encourage your spouse’s differences, support each other and agree to disagree, you will nurture a strong and healthy marriage.

Jeff Herring provides this helpful top five suggestions for strengthening your relationship:

1. Time together is time during which the complete focus is on each other. That means no TV, no newspaper, no kids. I know, I know, that’s hard in our over-busy culture. But stop and consider for a moment: Can you think of many things that are really more important?

“So what do we do with this time together?” you might ask. Simple: Talk to each other.

That sound you hear is all the husbands moaning and groaning and feeling betrayed that another male is actually suggesting this to their wives.

Be that as it may, there is no substitute for talking to each other on a regular basis. This can be about almost anything, as long as it is mutual.

2. Many of us had the word “honor” in our wedding vows. So what does it really mean, anyway?

Webster’s defines honor in this way: “to hold in the highest esteem.” Consider what your marriage might be like if you viewed your partner as precious to you, as someone to hold in the highest esteem. What would it feel like to be treated in this way by your partner? Might you then want to return the honor?

3. Many people believe apologies are a show of weakness. Quite the opposite is true.

The ability to apologize shows a strength of character that is a strong predictor of successful marriages. Often, the apology has more benefit to the one giving it than the one receiving it.

4. Everyone likes to feel appreciated. There are at least two ways to demonstrate appreciation. One is to show appreciation for things that have been done. This might sound like, “Thank you for taking the kids to the doctor,” or, “Thank you for understanding when I felt sick today.”

Sometimes, an even stronger form of appreciation is for the positive qualities of a person. This could sound like, “I really appreciate your sense of humor,” or, “I appreciate your patience with me.”

Either way, a little appreciation can go a long way.

5. It’s important that you share with each other your hopes and dreams. Anticipating together has at least three benefits: It helps couples to bond with each other; it gives hope for the future; it gives couples “light at the end of the tunnel” in the tough times that come in all relationships.

So there you have them, five quick and easy things you can do to improve even the best of relationships.

Here is one more thing to consider:

What could your relationship be like if you were able to do these five things regularly?

Terje Ellingsen asked:

Dating and establishing love relationships can be compared to choosing a vehicle. You pick out the make, model, year, color and features that you believe are best for you. After driving your vehicle for a couple of months, you realize that perhaps you should have purchased a larger car, or that maybe the leather seats would have been better, or on hot sunny days, the sunroof would have been nice. However, it is now too late so you choose to keep your car and accept the decision you made. It is the same for a marriage or couple relationship. Not everything will be perfect and there will be major obstacles to overcome but you have made your decision and now you choose to make it work no matter which marriage troubles you are experiencing.

Dating and marriage is different than it was thirty years ago. Today, more than 50% of all marriages fail for one reason or another. Just thinking about that makes “commitments” and marriage vows seem scary. It seems that when relationships are faced with challenges, people quit trying. Dating is more like a marathon, trying to date as many people as possible, instead of taking time to get to know someone on a deeper level. For married couples, divorce is not biased. Whether married for thirty years or eight months, the outcome can be the same.

The fact is that relationships, whether dating or married, are hard. Things do not always go perfectly, fighting does occur, and it takes a 100% commitment from both parties to make it a success. Often when people break off a relationship, they feel as though something is missing. The “spark” has gone, leaving one or both people feeling inadequate and unfulfilled.
However, even though the odds are not very good, it has been proven by many people that healthy and long-lasting relationships are definitely possible. Look at Paul Newman and Joanne Woodard, Danny Devito and Rhea Perlman, or Nancy and Ronald Regan. What secrets do and did they possess? The answer is: work hard at the relationship. They made a decision of choosing to love their mate rather than relying on the “warm and fuzzy” feelings, which everyone knows will fade. By making love a choice, you are making a decision that even in the bad times, you stick it out.

There are hundreds of things you can do to build, strengthen, and enhance your relationship. You can find lots of relationship self help resources online. Remember, little steps taken every day will add up to big successes.

Kristina Von Rosenvinge asked:

Growing your marriage into a lasting relationship involves learning to think in terms of WE. A marriage is a two person event. In the beginning the couple experiences a strong physical and emotional attraction to each other. Each is also tuned into the partner and focused on pleasing the other. They are happy and get married.

Gradually the demands of life put stresses on their relationship. They may experience a conflict between their personal happiness and their relationship happiness. It is how the couple makes room for both – personal and relationship satisfaction and contentment that helps their marriage grow into a lasting relationship.

Below are five concepts to keep in mind when thinking about how to nurture the marriage.

1. Love is a decision to do ongoing work to be a caring partner.

Caring about your partner is being cognizant that what you say or do has an impact on the relationship. You have to learn to think on two levels: I and We. Both are equally important.
Simultaneously you have to care about what your spouse needs.

2. Care about how you contribute to the relationship

Ask yourself how you can be a loving partner and then act on that. Accept your partner for who
he/she is and be of support to each other.

3. Work through stresses by focusing on preserving and enhancing the relationship.

Life inevitably brings stresses and conflict. By keeping in mind that preserving the relationship matters it becomes easier for each person to handle their differences in a way that does not adversely affect the marriage.

4. Behavior is conditional

Loving someone does not mean that one puts up with behavior that is destructive to the marriage. Each person has to take responsibility to act in a way that does not hurt the relationship. If one spouse has acted in a way that has been hurtful to the other there has to be a willingness to say “I am sorry”.

5. Develop a loving friendship

In relationships that last there is a joy in doing and being with each other. Likewise, there is freedom for each to be separate and pleasure at being connected and sharing a life together.

Mia LeCron asked:

16. Special Greeting

If your mate has to work late and you know he had a bad day, surprise him with a late-night gourmet meal. When you hear him arrive home, greet him in new, sexy lingerie, a warm kiss, and wonderful hot meal. After he picks himself up off the floor, he will fall in love with you all over again for this wonderful greeting. If reversed and the woman is coming home, after giving her a lingering kiss, have her join you in the dining room where the table is set with soft glowing candles and a wonderful meal. Have an envelope lying by her plate that when opened, she will read, “This certificate is good for one thirty-minute massage after dinner.” This is how you keep romance alive!

17. Just Because

Give your mate gifts “just because.” These do not have to be expensive whatsoever. For example, one woman had a miniature dish collection in her kitchen. Her husband came home and told her that he had a gift for her. Holding out her hand, he gently placed in her hand a miniature porcelain cup with her name neatly written in blue ink. She knew that this cup probably cost no more than $2.00 but the thought that he would take the time to find something she enjoyed, was worth $1 million. The small gifts packed with thought are far more cherished.

18. Say it with Words

Surprise your mate with little notes found in unexpected places. If your mate travels for work, place a loving note somewhere in their suitcase. Perhaps they have a long commute to work. If so, slip a note saying, “I love you,” in their CD case where you know they will find it. Another recommendation is sticking a note on the bathroom mirror so this will be the first thing seen in the morning. Be creative and have some fun with this.

Julia Jones asked:

Are you unhappy with your relationship? Is your romantic life on a verge of a break off! What most of us are going to answer is YES! In today’s world it is really difficult to keep a happy long lasting relationship. Marriage or dating whatever you are into, you find it difficult to keep the relation happy and long lasting. The life today is over stressed both men and women career oriented, they give 100% to their work. But it is not only the job where you have to give your 100% a relationship too needs that cent percent.

Every relationship undergoes its own phases of good and bad times. No relationship is perfect No relationship stays without a laugh, a hug, an argument, a misunderstanding, a cry. Initially all the relationship move smoothly but with the passage of time many relationships lose the charm and romance of their relationship. There is argument, conflict and bitterness resulting in separation.

During good times you take things for granted and forget to make efforts to keep the relationship intact. A relationship demands hard work. You have to work towards your relationship to make it happy and long lasting. Little steps taken in daily life make your relationship sweeter. When bad times are in there is all bitterness in your relation. The more you try to get stability in your relation the more it seems to deteriorate. You land up messing your relationship. You never know how things went wrong. All of a sudden there is a sense of coldness between you and your partner. At times we take a relationship for granted and ignore what our partner wants from us. And then there are times when we want to keep up a relationship but are unable to do so. Both the partners should know what they need from each other as well as what they expect from each other.

When you know what you want and expect from each other you have a way out to keep a healthy relationship. Remember a time when your relation went sour as you were not able to understand him/her or when in spite of loving your partner you landed in a break off. In a relationship there are times when you are really hurt, abused and angry and are on the verge of a separation, it is then you look for someone to give you advice. There are a number of ways to keep your relationship happy and long lasting such as understanding each others need, communicating openly what is within, showing honesty and loyalty. What you really require is an unbiased advice. Here we have 101 ways for you to keep your relationship happy and long lasting.